Why I fail at dating: Part I

For those that do not know a few months back my girlfriend of six years and I decided to break up. This was a mutual decision that I feel we both felt coming for a while. Why we broke up I feel is best answered that we both grew apart.

She was my first for everything. First girl I ever asked out, first girl I ever kissed, first girl I ever slept with, and first girl I ever moved in with. We had a good run, and a lot of fun times but I honestly feel we both just grew apart.

But being broken apart threw me into an awkward situation. For the first time since I was fifteen I was single. I really had/have no idea how to play the dating game. I never really knew how back when I was fifteen. My lack of knowledge makes me feel that I fail at dating.

The first girl I started to date after the break up was a coworker. I had grown a fondness for this girl over the time I had worked at my job. But I never did anything more than just a little bit of flirting with her. Before I had even moved out of my apartment with my old girlfriend I had started to hang out with her.

As a friend I took her to see a midnight showing of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”. One of my favorite pass times. I took this as a test, I honestly was not sure if she was into me or not (I can never tell with girls). Somehow I found a way to pay for her ticket, she put up a little bit of a fight, but I ended up winning. The movie went well and after words neither of us was ready to call it a night.

After the movie we went for a late night meal at IHOP. We kept talking without any awkward pauses. I took this as a good sign. When the waitress asked if the bill was separate we both hesitated. I eventually landed on separate, feeling that I would push her into thinking that we where on a date when she only wanted to be friends if I was to pay for the meal.

“I see how it is you will pay for my movie but not for my dinner.” She jokingly said.

I replied defensively “I am not for sure what this is. Is this a date?”

“No we are just two friends hanging out” she replied. The rest of the night was quiet.

I drove her back to her car and told her to text me when she got home so I would know that she got home all right. I lay on the couch of my old apartment waiting for her text. When it finally arrived I texted her “Good night” and fell asleep. I liked her but was fairly sure that I had screwed things up with her.

Thanksgiving and other ways of life.

I don’t know if it is because of age or what, but holidays just never seem as special anymore. When I was younger Thanksgiving and Christmas just felt like actual magical days. Getting around with family eating a lot of food, telling stories back and forth. But the last few years Thanksgiving has just felt like another day.

This year I awoke in my apartment and hour before my alarm went off. I dealt with this fact on a positive note that I would be surprising my family with my presence an hour earlier than I had planed. I took a shower and finished packing up.

I couldn’t find the normal SpongeBob Squarpants blanket that I usually use to cover the Guinea Pigs cage. So I improvised using some leftover fleece that I had purchased for Chewie to snuggle under. It didn’t protect them from the cold as much as I had hoped but they seemed to survive the trip to Lebanon. I kicked myself for leaving their food behind.

Like most trips to my parent’s house I spent most of the morning playing Rock Band with whoever was willing to play. Rock Band always tends to provide a way to help pass the time while I wait for the rest of my family to get ready for whatever destination we have.

The destination of this day was my grandparent’s house (my mom’s parents). I was surprised to find out that my mom’s whole family would not be coming this year. I was looking forwards to see everybody especially my little cousins Jack and Luke. But the day was not horrible, far from it. I actually enjoyed having a smaller and quieter Thanksgiving. I got to avoid answering all the typical awkward questions I usually have to repeat the answers to, such as “How is it living by yourself?”, “How is Ivy Tech?”, “Have you met any girls?”, and the best “ Is there anything you need?”. Don’t get me wrong I think it’s great that I have a family that cares about me. Something I probably take for granted. It great that they also offer me help if I need it. I just don’t like to take help, I like to know that I have succeeded on my own and have gotten where I have (not far) on my own.

I got to spend the rest of the day in front of the T.V. The best was hearing my grandfather get excited about “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” being on T.V. today. Hearing him laugh at that movie made my day. I have always felt fortunate that both my Grandfathers have great senses of humor, and very different styles as well. After watching an episode of “Seinfeild” my family decided to head back to Lebanon.

Much of my evening was still spent in front of the television (Like much of my life). I watched “The Tonight Show” with my mom and dad. Then decided to call it a night. This brings me to my point. Today felt like just another day.

I always like seeing my family, and it was even better I got to see my grandparents. But I just didn’t feel the magic of the holiday that I use to feel when I was younger. I feel this fact comes down to two reasons. I have gotten older and these holidays just start to feel like they come and go, and I am craving more adventure and excitement in my life (even though a Jedi is not to crave these things).

Lately I have not felt content with my life. I have lived on my own for a few months now and all I have really done is spend my evenings sitting on my futon and watched old DVDs. Within the last few weeks I have wanted to get out and do more. I want to meet new people do new things, go to new places. I feel like the break up I went through has placed the world at my feet and I am not taking advantage of it. The few adventures I have had since my break up have been a blast too. I want the world to see a new version of me. A less shy, more adventures me. I think I deserve that, and I think the world deserves that.

Why I love Star Wars Episode One the PT

Those that know me know that I LOVE Star Wars. Those that don’t know me welcome to my blog, and you are about to find out why I love Star Wars. Unfortunately I don’t have the time to make a well-organized argument about why this love has come so bare with my bad writing.

The thought of this article came to my mind as I rode the bus home from class/work. I was listening to my I Pod on the song shuffle setting when a song from my Star Wars soundtrack came on. For some reason this lead me to wonder why somebody would like the PT (prequel trilogy) better than the OT (original trilogy). Because I have actually met a couple of these people. Unlike Bigfoot they actually exist. The one thing these people have had in common was that they both watched the saga in numerical order. Unlike me and most of my other nerd friends who grew up with the OT these people waited for the saga to be over so they could watch it in chronological order.

While talking to these people they have all said that the PT was exciting and fast paced whereas the OT was slow and boring. I always took this as George Lucas trying to entertain people with special affects (PT) instead of a good story (OT). But on my ride home I actually tried putting myself in their shoes and thought how I would feel if I watched the series in numerical order.

These are some reasons I could think of that somebody would dislike the OT after watching the PT. The movie would just feel really awkward. For one the hero we watched in the first 3 movies is now the villain. Then we have to follow his whiny son around. I always hate it when a series makes a sequel that has the main character as the son or daughter of the main character from the first movie or book. The lightsaber battles are a lot slower. Then Vader never once in the movie yells “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” when something goes wrong, making him seem really out of character. Then with Empire so many questions would come up that would just confuse viewers. Like why weren’t Yoda and the Emperor in the last movie? But past the point of Vader telling Luke that he is his father (spoilers sorry) I can’t think of any other reasons for someone to like the PT better than the OT.

So after putting myself into others shoes I still can’t find myself liking the PT better than the OT. I just feel that so many things where done better in the OT. I don’t feel I need to go into detail here since most would agree with me.

Some will also disagree with me about not loathing the PT though. Of course the movies are nowhere near as magical as the OT. But I never really expected them to be. I’m not trying to argue with you and convince you into thinking the PT is watchable if you don’t think it is. But I am admitting that I can sit down and watch the PT and still be entertained for two hours. Episode one I enjoyed when it first came out without question. As I grew up more I started to notice its flaws. Keep in mind I was in 5th grade when the movie came out. This goes to show the movie was really aimed at capturing a new generation into the star wars universe. George Lucas already knew star wars fans would see the movie but he needed that new generation. This is why now I feel the movie would have been a lot better if Anikin was about five years older making him and Obi-Won closer in age. Jar Jar shouldn’t have been in the movie. If those to problem where fixed I think the movie would have done better among fans.

Then comes episode two. Why was the guy that played Anikin still not a good actor? Then why did a love story need to take so much time in a Star Wars movie?
Last I checked it was Star WARS not Star LOVE STORY. I don’t mind a little bit of a love story in my action movies but that one just took so long.

The most watchable of the pt was Revenge of the Sith, mainly because it mostly action. Yeah it was rather lame how all the jedi were killed, and the NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO was unforgivable. I can go on about problems in this movie. But I can’t help but admit my enjoyment of watching this movie.

So there you have it. My admitting of being able to sit down and enjoy watching the PT. Though I cant see why somebody would like the PT better. Fun can still be had in those three movies.